Big Break
So this is it…my big break. If you find yourself wondering what that actually means, don’t worry so do I.
Some say that Tom Cruise’s big break came with Risky Business, David Letterman got his delivering the local weather in Indiana, and Thomas Jefferson became a big shot after penning the “Declaration of Independence”. I am unsure if the aforementioned fellows were led down the path to fame and fortune from the time and hard work they poured into the “little” things they did, or if they were just in the right place at the right time.
I recently made my big break. After 7 years of teaching English in suburban high schools in Ohio, I up and quit and relocated to Chicago. It was not an easy decision to leave my teaching career. On a daily basis I found teaching a frustration, a distraction to what it was that I most wanted to do with my life: write. But I have to admit, there are those things that I miss. As the middle of August approaches and school years around the nation begin, I can’t help to feel that little ache in my heart for preparing my classroom, meeting students on the first day of school, and pulling out my lesson plans for The Crucible; an introduction to the Puritans in my American Lit class. On the other hand there are those things I will not miss: the book bag weighed down daily with papers to grade or lessons to create, the apathy of certain students who often seem to suck the life out of the most exciting of lesson plans, and the early, early mornings or the late, late evenings.
While I left many people shaking their heads, in the wake of my decision, I also left many adoring fans ready to read anything that I write, which is quite an exciting premise and a great launch for my big break. While I want to say “Give me a couple of months” to them, I find myself thinking ‘this is going to take some time’. I left with promises of grandeur and now I wished I would have snuck off quietly, with my plans veiled in secrecy. Chicago hasn’t quite welcomed me with open arms and I find myself in a barrage of self doubt about myself both personally and professionally.
The good news is that I have come to find that this is just a part of the process. The fears and the self doubt are all a part of the risk it takes to put yourself out there in the wide open. It was safe in my classroom, on most days. It isn’t as safe out here. But I am sure that Tom doubted the way he should have delivered a line, Dave second-guessed a forecast of showers, and yes, even Mr. Jefferson went through numerous rewrites before getting it right.
So this is my big break, no promises on its size quite yet. It’s a risky business. I predict some cloudy days ahead, but there’s something nice about declaring your independence. This is my beginning, my putting myself out there, my chance at something. While I know that it will take some time, I am ready to go through what it takes to achieve something big.
Some say that Tom Cruise’s big break came with Risky Business, David Letterman got his delivering the local weather in Indiana, and Thomas Jefferson became a big shot after penning the “Declaration of Independence”. I am unsure if the aforementioned fellows were led down the path to fame and fortune from the time and hard work they poured into the “little” things they did, or if they were just in the right place at the right time.
I recently made my big break. After 7 years of teaching English in suburban high schools in Ohio, I up and quit and relocated to Chicago. It was not an easy decision to leave my teaching career. On a daily basis I found teaching a frustration, a distraction to what it was that I most wanted to do with my life: write. But I have to admit, there are those things that I miss. As the middle of August approaches and school years around the nation begin, I can’t help to feel that little ache in my heart for preparing my classroom, meeting students on the first day of school, and pulling out my lesson plans for The Crucible; an introduction to the Puritans in my American Lit class. On the other hand there are those things I will not miss: the book bag weighed down daily with papers to grade or lessons to create, the apathy of certain students who often seem to suck the life out of the most exciting of lesson plans, and the early, early mornings or the late, late evenings.
While I left many people shaking their heads, in the wake of my decision, I also left many adoring fans ready to read anything that I write, which is quite an exciting premise and a great launch for my big break. While I want to say “Give me a couple of months” to them, I find myself thinking ‘this is going to take some time’. I left with promises of grandeur and now I wished I would have snuck off quietly, with my plans veiled in secrecy. Chicago hasn’t quite welcomed me with open arms and I find myself in a barrage of self doubt about myself both personally and professionally.
The good news is that I have come to find that this is just a part of the process. The fears and the self doubt are all a part of the risk it takes to put yourself out there in the wide open. It was safe in my classroom, on most days. It isn’t as safe out here. But I am sure that Tom doubted the way he should have delivered a line, Dave second-guessed a forecast of showers, and yes, even Mr. Jefferson went through numerous rewrites before getting it right.
So this is my big break, no promises on its size quite yet. It’s a risky business. I predict some cloudy days ahead, but there’s something nice about declaring your independence. This is my beginning, my putting myself out there, my chance at something. While I know that it will take some time, I am ready to go through what it takes to achieve something big.
posted by dmcg at 11:50 AM
2 Comments:
The wake has settled and we are all cheering for you:)
MacG we are all proud of you and wish you the best of luck! Keep in mind you've inspired a lot of your students and we're all waiting for you to accomplish you goals in writing so that you can inspire us more through your words. BEST WISHES!
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